Written on 8 Mar, 2007 by with No Comments
A word of advice to all of you interior designers out there: when you are picking out materials to use for the surfaces of a public restroom, the only surfaces which should have any sort of reflective properties are the mirrors. And I guess the sinks can too. Floors and walls in a […]
Written on 25 Feb, 2007 by with 4 Comments
I have a stupid haircut - by choice. For the past few months, I’ve had what I like to call a “Mullethawk.” It is basically a mullet cut to be styled into a mohawk. Or maybe it’s a mohawk shaped like a mullet. I’m not really sure because I’m not a […]
Written on 30 Jan, 2007 by with 1 Comment
The best thing about my mullethawk is that even on bad hair days, I don’t look as stupid as the guy with the bluetooth earpiece constantly implanted in his ear. Especially if the bluetooth guy is peeing at a urinal and simultaneously groaning out of enjoyment and/or relief.
Honestly, why is it necessary to keep […]
Written on 24 Jan, 2007 by with 1 Comment
I was about half way through my workout last night when a girl who looked like she was straight out of an American Apparel ad came and began working out at the bench next to me. Normally, I’m not distracted by girls working out next to me because I make a conscious effort not to look at them. But did I mention that this girl looked like she belonged in an American Apparel ad? Yea I think I did. That translates to: she oozed pure sex.
Written on 30 Nov, 2006 by with No Comments
It sounds like the voice is coming from between my legs. That’s strange, I didn’t remember anyone being down there. Sure, it seems like a silly thing to be unsure of…but hey, what if…? Did somebody slip me a roofie?